Noooooo! This is NOT Like Living in Paradise!

Oh no!

Have you heard of Rock Star: INXS? I never watched it, but I know from my deep connection to the Force that it sucked hard.

But.

Did you ever wonder why it was called Rock Star":". Well, seems the part after the ":" is gonna make a comeback next season. And if the current wave of bands trying to resurrect their careers after the loss of a bandmate (see INXS, TLC), this one ain't even dead yet.

Prepare, oh yee of little faith, for Rock Star: Van Halen? I hope, I pray, I sacrifice small children and lambs and goats and religious rightists that David Lee Roth sneaks in to one of the auditions and makes it through to Hollywood... or where ever washed up bands go to die.

You may go to Hollywood.

You may not.