Congrtulations on Iraq!

Your war is now officially more costlier than Vietnam. Way to go! There were those who said you couldn't do it, but we here never lost hope.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/4201812.stm

Caption Contest. First Prize = Nothin but love!

Hmmm. I've been staring at this picture, trying to come up with a funny caption but there's just too many to think of. First I thought about Rev. Lovejoy's wife crying "won't somone think of the children?!"; then something about God hating McDonalds. If you think of anything good, email it to us thedailynar@gmail.com

82 Order of Canada Inductees Today

In one last kick at the can, outgoing Governor General Clarkson named 82 people to the order of Canada today.  Here’s the list.  How Dianna Krall managed to make it on is beyond me, but hey, if Chris Farely a Star on the Walk of Fame, anything’s possible.

CBC Podcasts and Updates

Here are the podcasts you can listen to right in your browser.

Here is teh CBC Unplugged site, providing the workers point of view and their attempts to keep doing what they love.

The New Tory Ad Campaign

Man. I read about these ads on Warren's site before I actually saw them on Television. Well, I saw two last night, and let me tell y'all, its bad. Bad, bad, bad. Steve-o, I think its time to face facts:

1. You are a starched-shirt. Just do what you know.
2. You cannot act.
3. Neither can any of the other MP's in your ads - that's why they are in politics (this point is debatable).

Stephen Harper in work-casual attire looks more unconfortable than he did in those assless chaps of his. Although I suspect the chaps looked much better on the Cross Canada BBQ Tour.

End the CBC Strike

From the CBC's site:

According to The Canadian Press, CBC viewership has dropped to between 308,000 and 515,000 from the roughly 800,000 who usually watch CBC TV's nightly news program The National, while both CTV News and Global National News have both reported related audience boosts.

What concerns me the most is they express no real concern in the article about the impact this is having on viewers and listeners, at least not yet. They also indicate, rather subtly, that management is prepared to stay in this stirke for the long haul, referring to potential impacts on Hockey Night in Canada (that's in October for those of you under a rock).

In related news, staff currently locked-out plan to start their own national broadcast (via the internet) this week. I will link to it once I find the site. If anyone knows it, email thedailynar@gmail.com .

Axl has lost the freakin' plot.

Yes. Most of you know this sorry ex-rocker is bat-shit crazy, but this takes the cake. The guy goes and names himself sole owner of all Gun's and Roses material, and starts collecting all the royalties. Neat huh? Slash and Duff would beg to differ. Or should I say, Saul and Michael. Saul? Saul?!

http://www.azcentral.com/offbeat/articles/0826guns-roses26-ON.html

Sorry, still on the mac, so no link goodness.

RIP - Stevo Jensen

From MTV.com:

Steven "Stevo" Jensen, who was the original singer for punk band the Vandals, died over the weekend at his home in Maui, Hawaii. The cause of death has not been determined, according to a statement issued by former Vandals guitarist Jan Nils Ackerman. "Stevo was an inspiration to me and was always our friend ... always," the guitarist wrote. Jensen fronted the group from 1980 to 1984.

http://www.vandals.com/html/bored.htm

New Music Friday Vol. 22

Short update today:

- Every Time I Die's new album, Gutter Phenomenon, is now in stores. I've only had a chance to quicky preview a bunch of tracks, and so far so good. As I had predicted, it's much more rockin' than the previous Last Night in Town. For a good time, preview it here buds and budettes.

- I have rediscovered Irony is a Dead Scene, the collaboration EP between Mike Patton (Faith no More, Mr. Bungle) and The Dillinger Escape Plan. The more I listen the more I like it. I was pretty turned off the first time I listened to to, but I think that had more to do with the fact that it was never indended to be like Calculating Inifinity. Try and find this gem if you still can - it disappeared pretty fast.

Happy Funtime Story-hour: "The Bay Can Kiss my Ass."

Let me tell you a story. It is at times happy, but for the most part its quiet infuriating…

For the last month I have been locked in an epic struggle against the forces of stupidity and ineptitude at The Hudson’s Bay Company. About a month ago, I walked into the Bay to purchase a dresser. And all was good. I found a nice one, reasonably priced, and made my purchase. The salesman that helped me out was both friendly and knowledgeable. This I like. Unfortunately, this is where the happy portion of our story ends, and the soul-sucking disgust with modern customer service kicks in.

My delivery was scheduled for a week later, on a Tuesday evening (between 5 and 9). We made arrangements to get someone home by 5 to get the dresser, but lo and behold, it never showed up. A call from the store informs us that they delivery guys showed before or exactly at 5 and left. Nice.

So the next time they can deliver it is on Saturday. This is now doubly annoying because the old dresser is now gone to the dump. So a week of my clothes sitting on the floor later, Saturday arrives. They told us to expect delivery between something ungodly like 8:30-12:00 AM. At 11:30, I call the Bay to inquire as to where my dresser is. The lady on the phone informs me that it is indeed on its way, and is in fact on the “truck” as we speak. NOT TWO MINUTES LATER, another phone call from the Bay. I will paraphrase the conversation:

“Hello?”
“Hello Mr. Nar, this is the Hudson’s Bay Company calling”
“Yes?”
“It seems we have given away your dresser to another customer, and now there are no more. Someone else will call you sometime to do something about it…”
“WTF?”
“Ha ha sucker, bye.”*
(*only partial dramatization)

Obviously at this point I am becoming concerned. So I attempt to call back and speak with someone that can tell me what’s happening. After about 5 hours and 10 phone calls, I finally get through to the supervisor. Here’s how it goes: under the “new system”, when a delivery is attempted but not made, the product is re-listed as “available” in the system, and goes to the next person who ordered it. This doesn’t take into account that it may be the last one of its kind, or that I may have paid for a product that I would one day like to actually have in my possession.

The supervisor, upon hearing my objections to this corporate business practice, informed me that she would personally bring my “file” to the escalation department, who could get me the dresser from other warehouses or some bliz-blaz like that. I should hear from them by Wednesday of the following week.

Still with me? OK, fast forward to FRIDAY of the following week. No one has called me, despite several attempts to contact them. Then I get a call at like 8PM from the supervisor telling me “our system is down but don’t worry I’m getting you information manually”. I think that may have involved carrier pigeons of some kind, because no one actually got back to me until Monday afternoon. Some Dude on a cell phone calls me at work and tells me he’s from the escalation department, and wants to know why I wasn’t around for my delivery on Tuesday, and he’ll reschedule it. As I try to prevent my head from exploding, I explain to him the full situation. He says “Oh. Ok then I’ll find your dresser” just like that. I am instantly “spidey-sensing” danger.

The next day, Dude calls me again. “Ok, found it. When do you want it?” Still wary, I schedule delivery for the following day. I take GREAT pains to explain the delivery has to come at at least 5:30 PM so someone can be there. “No prob” replies Dude.

Next day. 3:45PM. Cell phone rings:

“Hello?”
“Yeah, this is Bay Delivery. Uh, what time are you gonna be home?”
“What? 5:30PM. Why?”
“We’re outside right now”

I place a frantic call to Dude, who reassures me that they will be there at 5:30. So cool, I think. And at 5:30, they actually show up. I am impressed.

That feeling soon fades. As the delivery guys unboxed the dresser, I hear one of them remark “uh-oh… Hey buddy! I don’t think you should take this”. As I turn to look, I see what he means. It looks like someone took a hammer to this thing. Bashed up, broken drawers, you name it. And I’d be even more enraged if it were not for one key bit of information: the dress in question is not the one I ordered. I am depressed.

Maybe this goes without saying, but I refuse delivery (please keep this in mind). I phone the supervisor, and Dude and tell both the same thing:

“F*ck this, I want my money back”.

The next day, I receive not one, but two phone calls asking me if I got my merchandise last night, and if I’m happy with it. I hang up.

And that brings us to yesterday. I have finally spoken with the supervisor, who assures me she will make sure they no longer think I actually have the bashed up shit box they attempted to pass off as a dresser, and will get me my money back. I have still not heard back from Dude. I am concerned for his safety.

Please keep in mind my clothes are still on the floor, and will now remain so for the foreseeable future.

So what is the moral of this story, you ask? It is this: corporate culture is complete bullshit. I can’t believe that this would pass for customer service even in Afghanistan. To say the left hand did not know what the right was doing is a major understatement. Never, I repeat, never purchase anything major from The Hudson’s Bay Company without two things:

1. A credit card (to cancel the transfer of money to those robber barons); and
2. A vehicle large enough to take exactly what you want home with you (because you’ll never get it otherwise).

Thank you,
Love, The Nar

Update: It's now September 1st, and still no refund. The supervisor (who I called) call me last night sound "shocked" that it was taking so long. The latest claim is that it should be processed today. Well it's four o'clock, and there still nothing in my bank account. Oh, and Dude has still not called back.

Dude, where's my manhood?

I'm sorry, I shouldn't be laughing at this, but come on - you know this guy is gonna get raked over the coals for ever by his friends for this one.

Teen girl charged after friend pushed

The Sault Star

A teenaged girl is accused of pushing her boyfriend to the ground at Pancake Bay Provincial Park Monday night. An argument escalated into a physical confrontation, Ontario Provincial Police reported. The female, 17, was charged with assault. Her name cannot be released under the Youth Criminal Justice Act.

The TTC rider homepage

Spacing Magazine has a link to a relatively new site dedicated to all things TTC rider-related. They are currently hunting for unorthodox rider tips, anything to make your ride faster. Check it out now! http://ttcrider.ca/

R.I.P. - Bob Moog

Every musician will know the name Moog.  Bob passed away yesterday, and leaves a legacy of pioneering and creativity in his wake.  RIP.

Is that baby on the hoof?

This is the funniest thing you will see today I guarantee. Some guy downloads Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith (or as they call it Back Stroke of the West?!), and it has been translated into Chinese and then back to English. I can't stop laughing at it...

And here is a link to the same thing, with different shots!

The Lifestraw

I fully agree with the article’s title, that this could be the absolute best invention of the century.  What a wonderful idea, and practical too!

Pot=Environmental Destruction?

Here's something I've never considered before: growing pot is damaging the enviroment. Apparently, pot growing in California has become a full-scale agri-business, repleat with all the destructive business practices that entails. Read the article here. Guess it goes to show that capitalism can kill anything, huh?

Ontario Government is back with student grants

The government has announced $100M is new grants for 16,000 low-income students (those with a household income of less than $35K/year). Sounds interesting, but leaves a few big questions hanging out there:

- what do you define as a "household"? When applying for OSAP, the government assumes a level of contribution from your parents, even if you haven't lived with or spoken to them in a long time. So you could see the problem of a kid living on his/her own trying to go to school but being ineligible due to their parents income level. And it takes 5 years of living on your own to be considered outside of your parents income. This is a bad deal, I've seen this happen at school.
- They take pains to state "this not a loan, its a grant". So? Does that mean it doesn't have to be paid back? Under what conditions? Don't just go handing out a heavier debt load to students, especially poor ones who may have trouble in school. If it's a handout with no expectation of repayment (based on some criteria of course) bravo.
- As NDP MPP Rosario Marchese says - what about the middle class? Ever seen a middle-class family try to send four or five kids to school. It doesn't always work out well for the last in line. What about the family making 36K a year? Are they out of luck?

I wouldn't be surprised if post-secondary schools take this opportunity to raise tuition either. Be wary of new "student access fees" or some crap like that. If this is truly an attempt to help less fortunate students get a chance to go to school and not have to split their time between work and study unfairly, then I really do applaud the government on this one.

The joys of the TTC

So appearantly the TTC was shut down today because of a bomb scare. I'd have to say, I would have been in the line this morning if anything had in fact gone awry. I took the bus to St. Claire and walked down to Bloor noting the heavy police presence at each station. One bridge that happen to cross an exposed part of the track was complete sealed off with police tape! Is this vigilance, or over-reaction? One official was quoted last time as saying something to the effect of "we don't want to be shutting down the TTC for every prank call we receive". So, are we to assume this was a legitimate threat? I have heard reports of 'suspicious' packages discovered in one of the stations or trains, but no confirmation of that (damn CBC strike!).

*did you know, that last year the PM was briefed several times on potential terrorist activities on the TTC? I'd show you the link but the CBC site is all wonky (damn CBC stike!!)


UPDATE: 15,000 passengers were affected by the stoppage, as the Toronto Police bomb squad was dispatched to Rosedale station to investigate a suitcase that was eventually found to contain personal belongings such as clothes and books.

The coolest thing you'll see today

Julian Beever's sidewalk art

Attack of the MegaRamp

What the hell? I always get mad when I hear skateboarding referred to as an "extreme" sport. Then I see crap like this. The only exteme this is is extremely stupid. Someone's gonna die before they realize this isn't a Tony Hawk video game.

Attack of the MegaRamp - The nine-story behemoth that scares the bejeezus out of the world's best skateboarders.

Phuket all!

Giv'er.

Post TechTV/Diggnation meetup

Last night was great. Big thanks to Jerod for making the trek. It was really great to see the great hosts from some of the shows that are no long on G4TechTV in the US. Here are some highlights.

- Leo Laporte gets mobbed everywhere he goes. It was pretty crazy to see how he couldn't walk five feet without getting bombarded by older dudes with (I'm sure) crazy computer questions. And, even more amazingly, he seems to love it!

- Kevin Rose is a mini-celebrity. That dude got cheers from the crowd like he was a freakin pro wrestler. Nice guy too, had a few minor chats with him around the place and outside.

- Dan can drink. And he can pull off wearing sunglasses at night. Corey Heart would be proud.

- Alex Albrecht is one super cool guy. He and I actually had a couple of really cool, non tech conversations throughout the night. It's almost too bad that he had so much to do, because he'd definately be the guy you'd want to sit down and have a beer with. If you ever see this, I'm sorry I forgot to grab you're email address!

- Managed to meet Jay Adleson, CEO of Revision3.com . They are the ones responsible for all the new programing like Systm, Diggnation, and thebroken. Check them out online, it won't be long before they start cropping up on a television near you. Hope to hear from you soon.

- Amber is a sweetheart. She was getting mobbed by fanboys with their camera phones but still took a second to stop and say hello as I walked past the madness. She even appologized for being so busy - how Canadian is that I ask you!?

All in all, a great time out. A lot more people than I would have expected, but fun nonetheless. Kevin and Alex managed to bang off a new episode of Diggnation early in the afternoon, and should be available sometime of Saturday (maybe).

New Music Friday Vol. 21

Small bits and pieces for today:

-Warren's band heads into the studio in the next week or so to record their first offering. You can be sure a review about it will appear here soon! SFH=So Freaking Hot or Sucks Freakin' Heartily?

-Coheed and Cambria have a new album about to land in stores September 20th . But you can listen to an advance track right on the front page of their sight. A little rock opera if you ask me. By the way, the name of the new album is (not suprisingly) Good Apollo, I'm Burning Star IV, Volume One: Far From Fear Through the Eyes of Madness. Yes, that's really it.

Sequels aren't just for movies anymore

Whenever a genre of entertainment becomes extremely profitable there is always a tendency to "stick with the winning formula".

TV shows have spin-offs
Books have squels
Music has radio (ha!)
Movies have sequels, prequels and spin-offs and anything else to kick a dead horse...

Well, for those living in a cave, you can add video games to your list. Video games are big time these days, grossing more than box office receipts in 2004. Games have to get bigger and better, and therefore, more expensive. This leads to companies taking the safe road and rehashing sucessful titles that didn't differ that much from the last game they made anyways.

Take, for example, Electronic Arts. EA is the world's largest producer/distributer of video games. They are what Microsoft is to computers. They took in over $3 Billion in profits last year. Yes, I said billion (that's a lot of quarters!). Of the 35 titles they plan to release in the next year, only 1 is a new intelectual property. 34 releases will be sequels. I guess we shouldn't really be suprised though, with all the children glued to video game consoles these days, that EA woudl simply try to maximize profit at the expense of creativity, art, or interest.

Funny thing though, some of the largest selling games of all time (and this is from my days as a writer for a game site) have ALWAYS been the ones to try something different. King's Quest, KOTOR, The Sims, Myst, Medal of Honour, Age of Empires, etc. These games have taken a new look at gaming, or maybe even their genres, and given it a swift kick in the arse. So, one may ask, where have all the originals gone? Is there no new blood left in these industries?

The answer, of course, is they are still here, you just can't see them. I don't know how it works in the publishing industry or movies, but in music, as in the gaming world, the big boys hold all the cards. You'll never see a bright, new, exciting idea in a game when the costs of creating a game is running around 20-30 million per AAA title (and taking on average 3-4 years to complete) - the big studios just won't risk that much on anything but a sure bet. That why you end of with everything this year ending in a number...

But maybe someday the gaming industry will take a cue from the music business, hopefully before they run into the same problems. Yes it's quiet easy to download games from the internet, but the problem is nowhere near what music companies are facing now. Young people's fundamental perceptions of music are changing - how they hear it and how they aquire it. The the old models can't keep up. There have been some innovations in recent years, but a lot more has to change in order to stay alive...

I'm sorry, I have no idea why I am going off on this stuff. Just read this article and let me know if you agree. The old models are crumbling and whether they like or not they have to change or die.

Update: TechTV/Diggnation Meetup

DORK ALERT!

Looks like The Daily Nar will be there tonight in all it's glory, with our world famous correspondent Diderote in tow! Here's the plan:

- Meetup at Ronnie's (69 Nassau Street) around 5
- Head to No Regrets Restaurant and Lounge (219 Dufferin Street) for the Meetup at 7:30

So come down, meet the crew from Call for Help, Diggnation, and many more ex-Screen Savers/TechTV types, as well as the Nar himself. I think Diggnation (which incidentally has the best background music of any show I've heard) will be taping their latest podcast (currently #3 on iTunes top 100 podcast list).

Just look for the haggard bastard in the blue Globe Skateboarding t-shirt.

Rule for Rock Audiences'

This is funny. Quote the Pepper "Cuff the pants to catch the tears - emo kids".

The Nar Man Cometh

Ahhhhh!

That about sums up my vacation. As you drive out of Toronto, you can literally feel the tension slipping away. 10 days of reading, canoeing, swimming and beer drinking can really make a person feel renewed. Thanks to Rebecca and her family for letting The Nar Posse invade the place for such a long time. Glad to be back with you loyal readers, just not necessarily glad to be back.

So now its back to biddness! Hockey is back, submaries sunk - then came back up, people got shot, and famous people died. I think that about covers what I missed in a nutshell. Will get back in the swing of things soon.

For those of you who enjoy Podcasting, there's a great one out there for Digg.com (see the headlines on the right sidebar) called Diggnation hosted by Kevin and Alex. If you're in Toronto, the boys will be up here for a meetup on Thursday night with the TechTV crew and many fans of the show(s). Details are here and here. The Nar will probably be there to geek out with the rest of you suckas!